78. Going Back

I recently saw a musician in concert who I last saw live in 1998. This brought up some interesting reflections. Back then, I was going a masters in Librarianship at UCL. I was attempting to find my way in the world after University (I have written about this in a previous post). At the time I felt like I was not making a good job of this at all. I really cannot say that enjoyed these years much. But seeing this musician again has allowed me to make a sort of peace with this period of my life. There were a lot of happy times and positive experiences as well as bad times. I am glad for the role this musician has played in helping to form the person I am today. I am proud to be a fan (time to fess up- this musician is Richard Davies)
But there is another aspect to this nostalgia
When I saw Richard Davies in 1998, I was just beginning to connect with other women with Turner Syndrome. I connect particular albums by Richard Davies, (especially Telegraph) with the first three years of being part of the Turner Syndrome community. It helps me to recall get-togethers at friend’s houses and day trips we took. It is to say the least ironic that I finally get to see Richard Davies in concert again when I asking some pretty deep questions about what role I wish to play within the larger community of women with Turner Syndrome and what role other women with Turner Syndrome play in my life.
I have to say as an aside that from 1996 to around 2005 I was deeply into ‘Indie’ music and discovered acts such as Super Furry Animals, the Flaming Lips, several of the ‘Elephant 6’ acts and Pernice Brothers. But it is probably only Richard Davies’ music that I really continue to listen to regularly (Great Lakes is another exception)- this was even before I knew about this summer’s concerts.
I have to say that rediscovering George Harrison’s music in the last three years has allowed me to make peace with my teenage years, and the effect of dealing with Turners Syndrome in these years. George and his music came at the right time and helped me to see that I was capable of determining what was important to me and that I had opinions that were worthwhile. His music made me feel good about myself when few other things did. My school mates found this a cause of considerable amusement (even my best friend from this period). I was made to feel a little bit of a freak, just as I was a bit of a ‘Freak’ for having Turner Syndrome. Well- I am only in contact with one friend from school and she gets that I am a George Harrison fan mainly because she is a Beatles/John Lennon fan herself. It has been a delight to connect with other George Harrison fans and find out what his music means to them. It has also been beyond a delight to discover what a great human being George was. It is also wonderful to discover other George fans who are such thoughtful, kind and intelligent people. Well, if I was right to be a George Harrison fan, perhaps I am not a complete fool.
George also played a role in helping find my way into the Turner Syndrome Community. Back in 1997, shortly after we met, Lucy and I discovered a mutual love of the Beatles and we attended the annual Beatles convention in Liverpool together. Some of the best memories I have of my friendship with Lucy are from the trip. The fact she loves the Beatles is one reason I am so fond of Lucy. I have a very dear group of friends with Turner Syndrome in Liverpool who I try and see a couple of times a year. They are proud of their native sons and glad I am a fan of George.